Annie - every day - you are still with me :) I haven't forgotten you!

Annie, your daddy still misses you every day -  every day - I promised you, I would not forget - my heart will not let me forget you - little girl. I took the day off on your Anniversary of Going to Heaven - Sparky and I walked your favorite walk, this was the second Annual Annie's Walk. I watched the video of you on the trail - It's burned in my memory forever. You were so happy that day, your new knee was obviously working - your little excited panting of "what's next Daddy? Let's see what's around the next corner!".  Such a happy little dog :).

Your brother Sparky and your two pups (as I call them) Spike and Mae - all have such good lives - we just celebrated Mae's second birthday, Spikes 4th and the 8th Anniversary of Sparky's rescue - it also means that it's been two years since you've gone to heaven to wait for Daddy - which still shatters my existence. If it weren't for them, I would be with you now, Shawnee.  I miss you so much, I never knew that a human could love a pet as much as I love you Annie.  Never - I'm sure in the history of time, someone has been as devastated as me at losing a little loved and trusted friend.  I still feel crushed that I let you down Annie. I'm so sorry. I never would have given you that pork bone if I knew it would splinter like that and even more so, I would NEVER have taken you to the emergency vets - I still remember looking at your walking in, I think we both knew - "this is it" our final moments - but it wasn't is it? Everyday Peanut, your Daddy thinks about you - every day. People speak of losing children, I imagine it is something similar but the world reduces the care and love of a pet to lower level, little girl - if you were a human, I could not have loved you more. It's funny Annie, I used to call you "child" and "Daddy's little girl" - surely not pet names.  You were my baby - from the time I saw your picture on the rescue website - I made you a promise to give you the best life that I could and I did, even at the end, I don't know anyone that would have made that type of financial commitment to keep you alive and bring you back to me - I did and still ended WRONG - I remember screaming. "No, No - this is not how our story is supposed to end, No - No" and laying my entire body over your little one, as if to protect you, one last time. Your heart stopped beating - I heard a flat line, I felt it stop, a part of me died with you, little one. I miss you, Annie - every day. I pray that whatever is out there when we die, has been taking the BEST care of you and given you all of the love that I would and made you feel safe and happy and giving you all of the treats that you could want, especially your "chickee treats" .. the chicken jerky that Ampop would buy for you! You love that stuff :)